1-
Every two weeks we receive a super helpful email reminding us it's been...two weeks since the last email, which means we're all about to be paid. So turn in those timesheets, baby. (Everyone in the building has a timesheet. Everyone. Even though 99% of us are salaried, like me.)
And every two weeks there's a Platitude or a Fun Fact just below the "don't forget your timesheets" reminder.
So about a month ago the whole shebang irritated me (maybe I hadn't popped a cold can of Diet Coke open in a while, maybe I was pissed from a conference call I don't know), and I answered the fact with a fact of my own, and 'replied all'. It's now expected of me, and ya know, that's fine.
So here was this morning's teaspoonful of useless knowledge:
FACT: Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
And here was my reply:
BACKGROUND TO THE AFOREMENTIONED FACT: Men have no awareness at all of how many times it is they blink.
If asked to verify a count, they ask their wives for help; they then blink slowly, deliberately, ponderously, making blinking look like a really big, important and ponderous job – so their wives will see how hard they work, doing all of that pseudo-cerebral blinking.
Not that I’m bitter or anything...
2-
I'm about to begin my on-the-job travels. Here's where I'll be going in the next couple of months - Louisiana, Indiana, New Mexico and South Dakota.
Ummmm....yeah. None of you guys are around any of those places, are ya?
I didn't think so. Bummer.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Of Timesheets and Where-I'm-Business-Traveling
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
25 comments:
They don't send you to San Francisco? Atrocious! You would get so many more interesting facts in San Francisco.
The reason men blink less is because we're afraid of missing a pretty woman walking by.
You had better learn to blink less, though. Some of those places you're going for work... blink and you might miss them.
Looking at all those exotic, vibrant hotspots you get to visit, I can only wish I had the same kind of travel opportunities. Oh well.
Thursday, 9:00am ~ 110:30am: Filled out time sheet.
Thought for the day: Can you believe we actually get paid for this shit?
I'm pretty sure, given the number of times my wife stares at me wide-eyed and incredulous, mouth open in that "I can't believe you just did that" way, that women only blink a mere fraction of the times men do. I always blink when something flies toward me at high velocity.
Sorry, the evidence before the court is incontrovertible*.
*Bonus points for identifying the song.
My mom's in Louisiana. Does that count?
That's awesome, ril. No clue on the song.
It's sad when pay slips come with trivia copied off the plastic strips on sanitary pads.
Ril: Patricia the Stripper?
No.
Like I would know any Chris de Burgh songs.
Shit.
ril,
I KNOW I KNOW that song! It's the Harry Potter mad-wrap thing. Blondster has it on her IPOD. i'm runnin to ask her the name of it right now...
....it's Allo Homora (or however the hell you spell it).
What's my bonus point prize, eh??
I'm hurrying off to work, but since I knew that answer, sorta, I had to say. Back to mess with the rest of you guys this afternoon...
No. That wasn't it. I'm not so modern.
What's an iPod?
It was my sister's album, honest.
And, um, you knew who sang it...
Next guess: 10CC. I'm gradually working my way through all the I can think of court-based songs here.
Google would be cheating, right?
It's only yourself you're cheating. Could you live with you later?
It's not "In the Court of the Crimson King" by the way.
It's a Pink Floyd song isn't it?
I've learned to sleep with my eyes open, which requires that I don't blink too often.
Yes! It's The Trial from Pink Floyd The Wall.
So BT gets 2 bonus points. When you get to 1000 points you qualify for a free Spork.
Oh, and this one's for McKoala...
Sweet!
Hey, this is what we should do on Whirl's blog while he's away. I'll post the next obscure lyric in his comment trail, the winner gets 2 points closer to their very own spork and post the next lyric, etc.
You can't get your company to send you to London? They're missing out on some amazing business opportunities there.
Let me know when you'll be in Indiana. I'm guessing you'll be in Indy, but I do travel to Fort Wayne to visit family. Maybe we can work something out.
Hey- just a quickie...I'm up for spork prize tries on Whirl's!
I'll be there to add on after work.
Stacy - I'm gonna be in Indy. You're right!
Tell me, FH honey! Seriously.
Oh, Robin, I don't know any details but there must be business opportunities in Londone, surely?
I know "meeting writerly friends" isn't a business opportunity but there must be something you can spin.
I agree, FH. I'll be there next year - we've got to do that thing again - and maybe McK as well?
Hi Robin. I've been reading back on all the posts I've missed. And I've missed being around so much.
I won't be at any of those fine places unfortunately but I guess it'll make a change from the pig-pen traffic of DC.
Hope all the editing is making your MS all sparkly.
I'll think of you when I'm having my next glass of wine.
This so serves me right for not checking back on all my lame guesses.
I'm sending my son to New Mexico end of the month - my mother lives in Mesilla. I think you've probably had enough mothers for the year though?
BAH, I got distracted by the last bit where I wanted to say that I LOVED your respoinse for the trivial question.
I think it's going to be great that you're traveling, and it won't be too far. Just enough for a change of things, but not too far from home.
You had me ROLLING wiht the blinking thing!!!
:-)
Thanks, Sylvia and Chris!
Post a Comment